🩵 Marriage, Fatigue and Thyroid Flares | Issue 199
What it's like being married to someone with Hypothyroidism & Hashimoto's.
Adam and I reached 7 years of marriage last week. Having been together since we were 16, we’ve now spent at least half our lives together and we’ve seen each other through many up and downs, especially when it comes to my health with thyroid disease. I’m exploring this more in this newsletter. 🩵
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This Week’s Topic: Being Married To Thyroid Disease.
What is living with a hypothyroid partner like?
Adam and I have been together since we were 16, which means he has seen me at both my best and worst health. We’ve weathered it all together, and, as per my current ongoing health struggles, continue to do so.
When we got married, my thyroid health was still very up and down. I had been on natural desiccated thyroid medication for about 2.5 years and was doing a fair bit better than being on Levothyroxine alone, but my gut health wasn’t great, my cystic acne was insane (I spent a good hour applying layers and layers of makeup in order to cover it), and my mental health was so, so wobbly. I struggled with an eating disorder and had anxiety and depression. I had thyroid flares fairly often. I still had a lot to address.
Adam and I have come a long way since then, having had a lot to figure out and navigate, including my fertility, a pregnancy loss and then navigating two successful pregnancies with thyroid disease which was really stressful.
I’m in a much better place these days thankfully and now we have our wonderful boys who make our lives even richer (and even more hectic!) to juggle too. My health continues to go through better and worse times and I’m more aware of this than ever right now.
How would Adam describe it? I asked him and below is his answer.
Hard. There is no clearer way to say it. There are bad days, good days and golden days. It’s a struggle mentally, physically and emotionally, for both you and for them.
On the bad days, you need to keep going. Just keep on swimming.
Make sure you remember that no matter how tired you are, how mentally drained you feel, it is probably nothing compared to how they feel. Nothing. Not even close. I see the pain she is in.
On those days, you need to step up, carry the extra weight or burdens in order to make things a little easier. Because they need you. They want you to be there for them.
On the bad days, it can hit you like a tonne of bricks out of nowhere, and over time you build up a tolerance to the bad days, to take more in your stride and know how to handle them. To have a cool head and be the mast in the storm you’re both going through. You get better over time at judging what makes things worse or simply doesn’t help, but you’ll never get it 100% right. Know that and work with that. You are both figuring this out together.
As time goes on, I’ve come to know that on the bad days, you can be both the hero and villain all at once. To be the hero they need to make sure they can keep putting one step in front of the other, the villain to make sure they get to bed on time and take those supplements or do the routines they hate but need to do to manage their thyroid condition.
You come to treasure the things that make them feel better. Being the one to make them that breakfast which makes them feel better first thing, or to help them have those few more spoons (energy). To make sure they do take the car and not walk, even though they really want to, because you want to make sure they can get through work to the end of the day.
That foot massage they need to be able to sleep through the muscle pain. That hot bath with the bubbles, just right – not too hot though. Do the things you said you’d do. Pick up your socks. Do the washing up. Make that extra trip to the shop when they’re feeling low. Get the best ice cream. Do the things only you know to make sure they get everything they need to feel better and come out of the hard days with thyroid disease.
Because when she does feel better, those are our Golden days. The days where everything feels mostly normal. The days where you can be the ages you really are. To be with the one you fell in love with all day instead of in glimpses.
They require the stars to align just right. Sometimes you can get close, and those are the good days. We still have days where we might be able to do all the things we wanted to do. To be silly. To laugh together. To cuddle and watch that next episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. To have Netflix ask “Are you still watching?”. These are the golden days that make it all worth it. And it is all worth it.
What are your thoughts and feelings on this? You are welcome to share in the comments section.
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Personal Health Check-in
I am waiting on the MRI for my back and had an appointment with the specialist last week. I also received my Medichecks test results back last week and was very shocked to see that my thyroid levels had dropped a lot. My Free T4 in particular is below the bottom of the range, explaining my fatigue, brain fog, low mood, weight gain and more… moire doctors appointments to come.
I’m continuing to struggle a bit mental health wise with everything I’m juggling regarding my health at the moment.
Social Media Spotlight
My most popular online posts in the last week were:
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Recent newsletters you may have missed:
🦋 Don't Make These Thyroid Medication Mistakes
🦠 Why Your Gut Health is an Important Thyroid Puzzle Piece
💊 Supplements That Help Thyroid Disease
Remember: My readers get 10% off any Medichecks test with the code “INVISIBLE10”. This is the thyroid test I always use - it’s a finger prick test I complete at home and pop back in the post! Very easy and I fully recommend.
International Thyroid Awareness Week
International Thyroid Awareness Week runs from 25th May to 31st May.
TODAY: Thyroid UK Online Event
I will be speaking at the online event hosted by Thyroid UK for International Thyroid Awareness Week!
Taking place TODAY on 29th May, you can sign up here!
Book Review: The Hashimoto’s Handbook by Mark Pilja
The Hashimoto’s Handbook covers thyroid basics, Hashimoto’s, why meds do not always help, diet, exercise, sleep and stress when it comes to having a thyroid condition, as they are so often very important jigsaw puzzle pieces.
Read my last newsletter here: “The Truth About Thyroid Blood Tests: What You Might Be Missing” | Issue 198
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